In This Hub:Emotional, Mental & Psychological Abuse – Killing With WordsSigns of Domestic Violence & Emotional Abuse Tactics Why Domestic Violence is Often OverlookedViolence, Power & Control WheelNon-violence & Equality WheelMade Crazy or Suffering Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder?Not Crazy, Just Brain Damaged!Complex PTSD – It is an injury, not an illness!Food For ThoughtLinks to related information and resources
Emotional, Mental & Psychological Abuse – Killing With Words
Emotional abuse can be just as harmful as other forms of abuse. In fact, it can even be fatal. Severe
emotional, mental and/or psychological abuse has been compared to the psychological torture tactics used
by various military interrogators on enemy prisoners of war.
The
effects of prolonged emotional abuse can have devastating physiological
effects on a victim, and will almost always have lasting ill effects on
the victim’s mind, due to the infliction of multiple psychiatric injuries. In extreme and/or prolonged cases of emotional, mental and psychological abuse, it can even induce suicide.
Signs of Domestic ViolencePhysical Abuse Emotional Abuse Social Abuse & Isolation Psychological Abuse Mental abuse Sexual Abuse Spiritual Abuse Economic/Financial Abuse Intimidation & Bullying Coercion & Threats Minimizing, Denying & Blaming
Emotional Abuse TacticsName Calling Criticism & Put-downs Yelling & Swearing Insulting you, your friends/family Lies and Manipulation Mind-games
Mirroring/ Counter-accusations Humiliation
Jealousy, Sulking Emotional Blackmail Using or threatening your kids
Complex PTSD – It is an injury, not an illness! Long term exposure to repeated emotional and mental abuse can result in Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Sometimes,
the term “psychosis” is applied to mental illness, and the term
“neurosis” to psychiatric injury. The main difference is that a
psychotic person is unaware they have a mental problem, whereas the
neurotic person is aware – often acutely.
Why Domestic Violence is Often Overlooked
In relationships where physical abuse is absent or minimal, many
victims may think that they are not experiencing domestic violence.
Unfortunately this is often not true.A lot of victims of domestic violence might never experience physical
abuse, but they are not necessarily the lucky ones.
Emotional
abuse can
be just as harmful and even fatal. Severe emotional, mental and/or
psychological abuse has been compared to the psychological torture
tactics used in the interrogation of prisoners of war. In some cases,
it
can induce suicide.
I think
that emotional abuse is the core issue in any form of abuse. Most
victims would never tolerate from a stranger the abuse that they endure
from a family member or significant other. That is the power of the
perpetrator.
Personally, I have experienced emotional, physical,
mental, sexual, financial and verbal abuse as well as social isolation,
and I think that the emotional abuse is much worse than the physical
violence. Blood and bruises are tangible things. They are there, you
can see them. No-one can deny it. Other people can see them too, people
who will support you and give you hope if you let them.
The emotional hold that the perpetrator has over their victim is
invisible, both to them and everyone else, and it can be hard to wake
up to it because it never happens straight away, they suck you in first
and then slowly the mental manipulation creeps in and they change you.
Mental/emotional abuse is never obvious, and the injuries it inflicts
can be invisible, both to the victims and to others, and can take much
longer to heal than a few fractured bones. Indeed some bury so deep
that they never do. Because it is so hard to recognize, emotional abuse
is also very easy to deny. Words can be twisted and distorted to
justify and excuse, and of course the things that are said to hurt and
manipulate you are only said behind closed doors.
It can be hard to
remember exactly what was said when your world feels like it is caving
in, and the abuser will jump on this uncertainty to highlight your
insanity and to once again shift the focus away from his own appalling
behavior, which makes one feel unsure about what really happened,
compounding one ’s confusion and distress, and deterring one from
objecting or trying to reason the next time it happens.
I’m sure you
can see why many people who have experienced emotional abuse describe
it as “crazy making stuff”. It most certainly is!
Made Crazy or Suffering Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder?
In
reality, the common description of emotional abuse as “crazy making” is
actually quite appropriate. Long term exposure to repeated emotional
and mental abuse can result in Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, which is, as the name suggests, a more complex form of PTSD.
Both
disorders are experienced as a result of a psychiatric injury (in
layman’s terms a type of brain damage), but where PTSD is usually the
result of one major psychiatric injury, and can usually be recovered
from in a relatively short period of time with the right support,
Complex PTSD, is the result of many psychiatric injuries, both minor
and major, that are inflicted over a long period of time. The symptoms
are also more complex, and so is the treatment, so the name is really
quite suitable.
The sad thing about Complex PTSD is that
recovery can take on average, 5 years, and can only begin once the
victim is removed from the situation that caused it, and given the
right support and treatment.
On the bright side, PTSD and Complex PTSD are psychiatric
injuries and they can be recovered from. The symptoms, such as anxiety
and depression, are not internal chemical imbalances, but reactive or situational disorders, and so people suffering from either disorder can make a FULL
recovery in
time. This is in contrast to other mental illnesses such as Personality
Disorders and Bi-Polar Disorder, which are the result of internal
chemical imbalances, and
although treatable, will never actually go away.
Food For Thought
Domestic
violence is reaching plague proportions in our community. It
does not just involve physical violence, and people need to recognize
this, especially the victims. In the end all we can really do is make
people aware of it and try to educate them. Patience and persistence,
as well as discretion pay off, but it still has to be their own
realization that makes them decide to go (or stay). As a community, we
can support, educate, and inspire, and most importantly, we
can model the right way to behave.
Please join me on FaceBookSTOP the Violence Against Women & Children
Organize
to Resist! Together we can take on the Predators! Let’s Break the
Silence to End the Violence by working together to make our voices a
Resounding SHOUT!!! Perpetrators BEWARE – you don’t stand a chance!Please Note:
All
names in this article have been changed for legal purposes and to
protect the privacy of the Author. Except where otherwise credited, or
where text forms part of an external link, this article is under the
following copyright:
Copyright © 2010 Mel Stewart, “safe-at-last”, of Perth, Western
Australia. All rights reserved.
All persons, places and objects shown in the images in
this hub are are shown for illustrative purposes only. They
bear no relation to any real person or event. All persons shown are paid models. Unless otherwise credited, all images are
under the following copyright:
Copyright © 2010 Mel Stewart, “safe-at-last”
and Licensors Nodtronics Pty Ltd. All rights reserved.
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